They Are Worth It All

When we take new children into our Sunshine Houses, I typically come home and write a blog right away about the experience. It is my way of processing my emotions from the day and wrapping my head around it all. For sure, bringing an orphaned child home and placing him into one of our families is a cause for celebration. But the process of doing this…hearing their sad story (which is usually shared with us right in from of the child as he sits with his eyes downcast), seeing the poor conditions they were existing in, and simply sitting alongside a child who has been abandoned and discarded…is emotionally draining. Yet the experience I had in accepting our 3 newest children was one that was so difficult, I could not even write about it. I have had to dwell on it, let it sink in, and watch with my own eyes to see the children transform to flourishing in our care before I could put it on paper. 

 In April 2021, my colleague and I were taken to visit three orphaned children living in our local community. We were told they were three girls, ages 13, 11, and 9. The representatives with us from Accao Social did not even know where their house was. But when we arrived at the market located near their home and began to ask the locals for directions to their house, literally everyone there knew of the “suffering children” and where they lived. A woman who sold charcoal at her stand agreed to accompany us and show us the way to the girls’ house. 

 We arrived and were faced with a 16-year-old boy, Dario, (with hair on his upper lip), a 10-year-old girl, Anabela, who was physically challenged and could not walk, and an 8-year-old boy, Ivan, who also had physical limitations, but at least he could walk. Anabela did not even make eye contact with us the whole time we were there. She sat on the ground banging a plastic bottle against the ground over and over and over, leaving me to question if she was also mentally challenged. Ivan was not at all interested in our visit and immediately left to play with friends. Dario was a gracious host and shared their story with us. 

Their mother had fallen ill 3 years ago, when Dario was just 13. He quit school to stay home and care for his mother and younger siblings. After a year filled with great suffering and struggles, their mother died. They had been living with their maternal grandmother, but she was overwhelmed by everything and abandoned them, going to South Africa and has not returned. No one in the family stepped in to take the children. They continued to live in their grandmother’s house, relying on neighbors to share an occasional meal with them. They would go for days without food. They never knew when they would eat next. They had a roof over their head but nothing else. The area they lived in was not at all secure or safe or clean. They had no one to protect them, nurture them, or provide for them. 

Anabela’s inability to walk started about 4 years ago. She developed a sore behind her knee. It was painful to walk, so she started to crawl. This happened at the same time that the mother became sick. Because everyone’s attention went to caring for the mother and then dealing with her death and funeral, Anabela was not given any treatment or attention. Her feet are now in a “ballerina position” pointing straight and her leg muscles have not properly developed. Because she has spent her life on the ground, she has difficulty even maintaining her balance while sitting in a chair.

                              

Ivan walks/waddles with his legs straight. He can, however, easily bend his knees and go up and down stairs with no difficulty. From what we can determine, the root problem comes from his hips. So he can walk, but he cannot run and play with his peers. Dario didn't know what would have been the cause for this. 

We were so taken aback by all of this. It was totally unexpected. We left really struggling over the situation. We literally felt numb…not knowing what to say and certainly not knowing what to do for these children. We felt guilty that our first response was that we could not help with these children. How does a person see such a situation and then just walk away from it? 

Our Sunshine Approach Foundation creates families by pairing a widowed woman with 4-5 orphaned children. We provide a home, monthly living expenses, full assistance with medical and educational needs, as well as guidance and supervision for the mothers and children. We did not in any way have the capability to care for these 3 children. The oldest boy, Dario, was too old for our program. His sister’s, Anabela, and brother’s, Ivan, physical challenges were daunting. We have no experience in helping such children. We do not have the necessary equipment or the "know how" to help such children have access to life. Finally, when one takes on a child who cannot walk, they are taking on the care of that child for life! But again, we were left with the question…how can we not help them? Because it was very clear that no one was going to intervene.

We decided to move slowly and do what we could for them. We started by visiting and bringing food and clothing. We went back to see the children the very next day. Ivan met us at the car and welcomed us with a big hug. He went from being completely uninterested in our presence to showing affection to us. Anabela was down the street with friends. When she spotted us, she literally came racing down the road on her hands and knees, crawling to meet us. She was moving so quickly that there was a cloud of dust behind her. My heart leaped inside my chest…she could move! If she could make such agile use of her hips, knees, legs, arms, etc…could she be taught to walk again??? 

 Dario welcomed us to their home once again. This time, he took us inside to show us where they live. The “windows” were all closed up with cement blocks. There was no light or air in the house. The three children shared a double bed to sleep in. They had a small charcoal braai to cook food on…in fact Dario had just lit the charcoal to cook their meal for the day. We left them with food and some warm clothing and went on our way. 

Still the question lingered, how could we help them? I strongly felt that we could not abandon these children. But I was scared. What would our future be like with these children in our care. If you take on a child that cannot walk, you are taking that child on for life. Our mission is to raise up our Sunshine children to lead independent lives as active, contributing members in their communities. How would we find a mother who would be willing to care of Anabela? In Mozambique, handicaps of any kind are considered to be a curse on the person and on their family. Most women would not have the physical capacity to assist a 10-year-old child with their daily needs. But then to deal with the social stigma as well would be a lot to ask of her. And what was Dario really like? He was 16 years old! What kind of friends did he hang out with? What bad habits had he developed being on his own with no adult supervision or guidance for 3 years? He could be a huge problem for us. 

I continued to feel we could not do nothing. But I also felt peace in God confirming to me to move slowly. And so we did. 

The more we learned about Dario, the more we fell in love with him. He stayed home with his siblings and cared for them during his mother's illness. He returned to school after his mother's death and is now in 6th grade. His whole life consisted of going to school and caring for Anabela and Dario. He is the one who bathed them, washed their clothes, cooked their meals, and protected them. While visiting with him, we learned that he has no friends because all of his time is spent caring for his siblings. When asked if he ever goes out, he replied that he rarely does, and that when he does, he cannot stop thinking about his sister and brother and wondering if they were okay. Dario willingly gave his life and sacrificed for his family. He has a heart of gold! 

As we went through this lengthy process, these children never left my thoughts. They were my last thought upon going to sleep at night and my first thought upon waking in the morning. One morning as I woke, I felt God giving me assurance that Anabela would walk again. I also felt that He would confirm this to me in 3 ways. I got up to begin my daily devotional and prayer time. I opened my first prayer book, “90 Days of Power Prayers”…it began with Matthew 19:29- “But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, ‘With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible.’” Wow! Confirmation #1. I even took a photo of it with my phone so as not to forget. After praying over this, I went on to my second book, “Praying for Your Husband” …it began with Mark 10:27- “Jesus looked at them and said, ‘With men it is impossible, but not with God; for with God all things are possible.’” Confirmation #2!! I was on a roll! 

At this time, I was reading through the book of Romans, one chapter each day, and journaling on each one. On this day, I was on Romans 11. I opened my Bible fully expectant for my third confirmation. To my disappointment, this chapter was about the Gentiles being grafted in with the Israelites to God’s kingdom. Hmmm...not what I was looking for. I went on with my day, showering and heading out to work. As I went through the day, I wanted to believe Anabela would walk again, but I also felt I could not truly believe it without that third confirmation. I came home at the end of the day questioning if I truly did hear from God and starting to doubt. I sat down and began mindlessly scrolling through Facebook when I came upon a post by a friend in London. She wrote, “I so needed this reminder today…and maybe you need it too!!!” She posted a quote by Corrie Ten Boom, “The wonderful thing about praying is that you leave a world of not being able to do something, and enter God’s realm where everything is possible. Nothing is too great for His almighty power. Nothing is too small for His love.” Confirmation #3!!! Time to pray and move forward! 

I connected with a friend who is a physical therapist. She agreed to meet with Anabela and give us her opinion on her condition. We traveled to her office in nearby Maputo. The trip in the car gave me the opportunity to talk with Anabela and get to know her better. This little girl in no way has any mental restrictions. She was engaging and fun! She loves the beach, even though she has never been there. She very much wants a talking doll like the one she saw on television. When she grows up, her dream is to move away and live in a big city. Over the time I have known her, I can attest to the fact that Anabela is the most happy, joyful child I have ever met. She loves to play, smile, and dance. She is easy going and just plain happy. 

As my friend, Geraldine, poked, prodded, moved and adjusted Anabela, I rejoiced at every comment she made. She said that her feet are still soft and pliable. That she had good movement in her feet and hips. She concluded that with therapy, daily exercises done at home, the use of a standing frame and splints, it is very possible that Anabela can walk again! Immediate tears of joy filled my eyes. Those were some of the sweetest words I had ever heard! It will not be easy or inexpensive. The exercises Anabela must endure several times each day are painful and she cries. But we promised her that if Geraldine sees improvement at each consult, she will get that talking doll for her very own. Also, because Geraldine's office is not far from the beach, she will get rewarded with a stop at the beach after each appointment. These external rewards will indeed encourage her to work hard, but Anabela has a strong will to walk again. It is something she wants for herself. Therefore, I believe in her!

As a result of this consult, I posted on Facebook looking for someone who could make a standing frame for us to use in Anabela’s therapy. Connections that only God could orchestrate started to pour in! First a missionary acquaintance in nearby Machava contacted me. Her and her husband operate a ministry for the physically challenged. They could provide a walker and a standing from for Anabela. Then a woman who recently moved to Mozambique from South Africa contacted me. She is an orthotist and offered her help. At the same time, unbeknownst to either of us, Geraldine, the physical therapist, and this same woman had already connected regarding working together to treat Anabela using splints to straighten out her feet! Everything and everyone we would need to help Anabela began to fall into place! 

About a month after meeting the children, I sensed that we were to move and move immediately in taking these children. I began to ponder over which of our current mothers would be willing to accept and raise these children. I conducted by own informal poll and separately asked my colleague, Delcio, my husband and my son who they thought would be a good mom. Each of them gave me the same name, and this confirmed by initial thought…Zelda. 

Those of you who have read my blogs before know of Zelda. She was our first Sunshine mother. She has been with us for almost 8 years now caring for Cecilia, Madalena and Antonio. She is an absolute treasure and I often call her my angel. Delcio and I met with Zelda and shared the story of the children. We asked her to consider caring for them. We committed to walking alongside her and supporting her with this. We concluded by telling her that this was a big decision, we did not expect an answer right away, but we wanted her to take the time to think and pray before accepting. At this point, Zelda, who had been silent and had shown absolutely no expression on her face, held up her hand and stopped us. She said, “I do not need any more time to think or pray. I will accept these children.” Delcio and I burst into tears! (Delcio and I have done a lot of crying lately!) She then went home to discuss all of this with her three children at home as they too will play an important role as siblings. All three gladly agreed to accept Dario, Anabela and Ivan into their family! (Cue more tears!)

We moved into action planning and constructing an additional bedroom added onto Zelda’s house. We also turned her veranda into a kitchen, thus doubling the size of the living room. For three weeks, her house was a complete mess! What seemed like a simple, easy project turned out to be much more of a task than we had expected. Again, Zelda has been a complete saint…living in the dust and dealing with the daily confusion and noise. And she even took in the children before it was completed! So there were 6 children living with her in a two bedroom, torn apart house. They barely had room to move around, and so spent most of their days outside! 

At this point, the Beacon of Hope program entered my mind. I love everything about this program and its focus on raising up men of God! This is a three-year program operated the past 20 years by Angie Wheeler, a newly acquired friend of mine, in nearby Machava. They accept 12 teenaged boys every three years and provide them with all they need to grow into godly, responsible, independent young men. In a world where the social impact focus is on women and girls, I feel for the men and boys. Who is there to teach them and raise them up to be strong, responsible, loving, protective, godly leaders in their households and their cultures? I agree that the rights of women and girls must be developed and protected and that their position in many cultures must be elevated. But I also believe that if there is no attention given to training our young boys to be good men, any culture is going to be “half” and sorely lacking. 

 I knew that the program at Beacon of Hope had started operating again back in January. It was now May. I assumed that by now, the program was full and running smoothly. I assumed Dario would not be accepted into the program at this point. But I couldn’t stop thinking about Beacon of Hope and how perfect it would be for Dario. He never had a male role model in his household because his father abandoned the family when he was very young. Beacon of Hope has a staff that includes godly, male role models that Dario can look up to and learn from. Dario was only 16 and for years had been carrying the weight of his mother’s death and the care of his siblings. Dario was only a child when he took on all of this responsibility. He never had the privilege of being a carefree child and enjoying friends. Beacon of Hope would take the burden of these responsibilities off Dario’s shoulders. It would allow him to have friends and the camaraderie of brothers-in-Christ. Dario had fallen behind in school. Beacon of Hope would provide the tutoring he needed to catch up to his peers. Dario attended a local church when he was able, but his attendance was spotty at best. Beacon of Hope would provide him with daily spiritual teaching and guidance. But…I assumed it would be too late to get Dario into the program. 

I avoided calling Angie, even though I knew she would be extremely kind in turning us down. Finally, I felt God clearly pushing me to call Angie, so I decided to contact her. I cheated a bit and sent her a text message. I figured it would be easier to get the rejection in writing. I sent the text and within 30 seconds I got a call from Angie. I answered the phone and she immediately said, “So tell me about Dario.” After listening, she said she felt that they would be able to accept one more boy into the program but that she would have to discuss it with her staff and get back to me. She called me later that day and said the staff agreed and Dario was welcome! 

It was a frustratingly long and painful process to get these three children into our care. Social Action was not cooperative or caring about their horrible situation. After writing and submitting our letter of acceptance, it took 1 ½ months for them to complete the process. Once the process was completed, it sat on the director’s desk for 3 weeks until she signed it. Once she signed it, it took 2 weeks to get her letter of permission to release a social worker to accompany us to place the children in our home. We did our best during this time…bringing the children food and calling Social Action every single day. Our hearts hurt so much for these children. We wanted to help them, but our hands were tied. The case workers at Social Action were weary of our calls and badgering on the behalf of these children, but they were worth the fight. On July 1st, we finallyyyyyyy got the needed letter of permission to go with a case worker and move the children into our Sunshine House! 

 Dario is now flourishing at Beacon of Hope! He lives there in a dorm with 12 other boys, but on his school holidays, he will come live at our first Sunshine House. On a recent holiday visit, I asked him what is his favorite thing about Beacon of Hope. He thought for a moment and with a huge grin on his face replied, “Everything!” 

Anabela continues with her physical therapy. The daily exercises are grueling for her, but she submits to them, knowing they will help her to walk again. She is being schooled at home by Zelda (with help from her new siblings). 

She loves to play with dolls, sing and dance. Just today, we took Dario back to resume his studies at Beacon of Hope, but this time, Anabela did not cry. She feels safe and loved where she is living, and she knows that Dario will come back. 

Ivan has been enrolled in first grade at the local school. He has made many friends around the house. He is very good-natured and easy-going. Therefore, he has made friendships quickly. Once we have progress with Anabela's treatment, we will start physical therapy for Ivan.

God is indeed the defender of the oppressed and the fatherless. He saw Dario, Anabela and Ivan in their need. He had a plan for their lives. He is using the Sunshine Approach Foundation and Beacon of Hope to bring Dario, Anabela and Ivan into the full potential of His purpose for them! He is a good Father! On his recent holiday break, Delcio and I took Dario to the cemetery to put flowers on his mother’s grave. Before we left, we bowed our heads as he prayed. He told his mother that he loved her and knew she was in a good place in heaven. He thanked her for sending Delcio and me to care for them. Yet again, Delcio and I were in tears. We do not take our work for granted, and we are thankful, so very very thankful to have the privilege to be a part of every life God has entrusted to our care.